The Journey Never Ends…

As I blog I have always thought to myself “what information does the reader want to know, will they find my personal spin on it entertaining yet informative, and will it make them a better, healthier?!…”. Then I consider what it is as a reader, myself, do I want to read about in the health and wellness genre. The thing I find most inspiring in personal blogs about health is the personal journey. Being able to say “hell yeah…I know what you are talking about…ME TOO!!” So when I blog I chose to relay my own personal experiences mixed in with information that one can use to further them along their own journey to health and wellness. I believe in being real about myself and my own struggles, and at times straightforward about what I believe it takes to become healthier.

That being said maybe I should catch everyone up to where I am in my life long pursuit of ultimate health and wellness, which includes my weight-loss/gain journey as well!!! Back in April I was doing well with my eating/exercise until my asthma got the best of me  and I ended up in the hospital for 11 days. For the entire 11 days I was on mega doses of IV steroids, then after discharge I was on oral steroids for another month. Before leaving the hospital I packed on nearly 20 lbs. I was so disgusted with the whole thing. For 4 months I fell completely off the wagon…no exercise…I ate what I wanted. So in addition to that I added another 10 lbs. I might workout once here or there but never very seriously. The end of August, I had a resurgence of interest when I had to buy a bigger size in my scrubs for work. I did good for a few weeks exercising, but my diet still left something to be desired!! Then my favorite trainer, Shaun T came out with his new workout Focus T-25 (no this isn’t a lead into an advertisement for this workout…) I bought it and started it on September 16. I started working on my diet two days prior on the 14th. To keep myself accountable I took pics and measurements and weighed and submitted all the ugly truth to the Focus T-25 Challenge!!! At this point I am currently on Day 25 of the program. I am in the midst of week 4 of the Alpha Cycle and have lost 7.5 lbs and 3 inches total. I feel amazing and can see the body changes already!!! In addition I have not had any diet sodas, chocolate bars, or artificial sweeteners of any kind in the last 4 weeks. I am working out 6 days a week and keeping a very strict eye on my food intake. Measurement days are always on Saturdays and I optimistic that I will see more success!!!!!

I think the point of this post is to remind everyone that we are all human, life happens and we falter, but the important thing to remember is to pick yourself back up, dust off your workout britches and get back in the game!!! If I have learned nothing else over the last 4 years, I have certainly learned that the Journey NEVER ends…

~B

UPDATE: “Five Months Later…a Relapse, a New Year, a lil Honesty, and getting back on the horse!”

In my previous blog today I made a commitment to making new realistic goals to get back on my path to healthy living.

” My first goal for today is to get up and move,

more specifically I am going to grab my fur-babies,

and a family member that wants to tag along and

we are going to take a Sunday afternoon stroll!”

I am happy to report first mini-goal ACCOMPLISHED!!! Granted it wasn’t walking, and the fur-babies didn’t tag along. Slight change of plans, but exercise nonetheless. I know it wasn’t much, and 4 months ago biking 4-5 miles was nothing. But having just got out the hospital Friday, not being back at baseline with my breathing, this was a huge accomplishment for me today!

On a side note I want to thank my daughter Savannah for biking with me and being gracious enough to give me the kick in the ass that I requested in my previous blog!

~Brandy

 

Five Months Later…a Relapse, a New Year, a lil Honesty, and getting back on the horse!

When I started this blog my intention was three-fold. My first goal was to motivate others. My second was to educate, provide information, and food for thought based off of my personal experiences and what I am learning in my health and wellness classes. Finally,  my last goal was to motivate myself by doing so for others. Blogging, talking about my trials and triumphs aided me in the accountability department. This was to be yet another tool in my arsenal to continue down the path of ultimate health and wellness.  And it was that and so much more! What I was saying, led others to talk, lines of communication were open and my message was getting out there. This was so empowering.

As with so many things in life we get busy, bogged down in the reactive, fear-based, stress-filled, not enough time in the day, blow and go cray cray world we live in. Then it all comes crashing down…stress, worry, anxiety leaks in despite your best efforts to maintain contemplative practices for the mind and body to fend off these evil fends. The arch villains have breached the sanctity and security of your home-base (your body.)  The super-badies have a foot-hold in your lair and they are inviting their friends. It’s a full on strike, invading your defenses (your immune system.) Granted you are fighting the good fight, but it isn’t enough – BOOM. Now you are sick! For me, an asthmatic, it has always been important for me to keep emotions, feelings, that naughty Mr. Stress and his side kick Boy Worry in check. In addition to virus’, bacteria, the weather, all of which I have little or no control over; having an emotional overload leads to asthma attacks. With a very elaborate combo of these  issues, in September of 2012, I landed myself in the hospital for 4-5 days.

Now this was the beginning of relapse for me! Let me back up a bit and explain why I use the term “RELAPSE.”  I have mentioned stages of change previously in another blog. (see TTM or transtheoretical model of change) This is the most popular stage model in health psychology today.

There are five stages of change in the TTM. The stages of change are:

1. Precontemplation (Not yet acknowledging that there is a problem behavior that needs to be changed)
2. ƒContemplation (Acknowledging that there is a problem but not yet ready or sure of wanting to make a change)
3. ƒPreparation/Determination (Getting ready to change)
4. ƒAction/Willpower (Changing behavior – less than 6 months)
5. ƒMaintenance (Maintaining the behavior change – more than 6 months)

Many of the experts in the subject area add an addendum to the 5 stages by lending focus to an extra stage…Relapse (Returning to older behaviors and abandoning the new changes.)

….So earning myself an admission to the hospital led indirectly to my relapse. So here comes the honesty. When the doctors start talking about admitting me to the hospital my mind goes into Panic mode. The only thing I can think of is…..”IV STEROIDS” UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH…..They are talking and all I can hear is the self-defeating negative voice in my head talking about gaining weight from steroids, having to hold off on exercising for a while, and the ravenous cravings that will be coming along with swelling and bloat. (in fact i think my blood pressure is going up just thinking about it now…EEK) I know it will take several weeks for the steroids to be purged from my system, which leads to more negative thoughts. I cannot even think about the important thing, positive thinking and concentrating on healing…NOOOO I am too busy rustling up more stress and worry. When I did finally get well and discharged from the hospital I got sent home with 2 weeks of steroids. After this I had a hard time getting back on track, which is unusual as I am always over-eager to get back to my practices. After-all I had been in the maintenance stage for over a year. For the rest of Sept I worked out once, my eating was sporadic. There were periods of normal healthy eating mixed with binges on sweets. October rolls around and I exercise three times that month, but my eating habits were back on track. Of course at the end of of October I had a really bad asthma attack and ended up at the ER and then sent home with more steroids. Nine days this time. And of course the self-defeating voice was back, its like a vicious cycle. After this I worked out twice in November and once in December.By November I said the hell with it, its the holidays and I am going to enjoy myself. So I ate what I wanted, exercised three times in two months, and had the intention of starting over a few days after Christmas. On the 27th of Dec I started back eating well, no problem. Butttttttttt the exercise just wasn’t taking off yet.

That brings us to the New Year. As a side note I am not one for making New Years Resolutions, I feel like they just set me up for failure…maybe that’s the wrong mindset to have, I dunno. So I continued on with my healthy eating habits and said its a new year dammit, “I need to exercise.”  Finally I got up off my ass and did something on Jan 7th. Granted that has been it. (as embarrassingly sad as that is to have to admit..but true nonetheless…) Of course I was plagued with yet another illness last week which lead to a 24 hour stay in the hospital, yes asthma again, and yes more IV and then oral steroids to follow. I got out Friday the 18th. Just seems like its been an endless spiral health-wise for last four months.

And now here I sit, drenched in the guilt and disappointment, covered in the shame of allowing myself to have gotten so off track for 4 months. Disgusted with myself for allowing the negativity to permeate my being so much so that I stop doing the things that I know my body, mind, and spirit so desperately need to live an intentional, purpose driven, heart-centered life. I am mostly just angry at me. I am angry because I accepted the excuses I handed myself, I self-sabotaged my health and wellness path with mines and traps. And instead of persevering and being the fighter that I know that I am, I just plopped on the ground said the hell with it all and watched the last 4 months slide by.

I guess it’s not all for nothing, I did gain a few things from this Relapse… 1– 25 lbs. and 2 – the knowledge that I am human, imperfect and fallible.

So the question is WHAT NOW? What do I do? and How do I get back on track?  The expert and technical answer is…

• Evaluate trigger for relapse 
• Reassess motivation and barriers 
• Plan stronger coping strategies

What this means is I need to do several things….

1. Self-reevaluation – I feel as though I accomplished this step this morning. Writing this particular blog ended up being very therapeutic! Being truly honest with myself for the first time in months has lifted a heavy weight off my shoulders. I feel purged, refreshed, and ready to begin again. (For real this time..NO….REALLY!!!) 
2. Control External Stimuli  – this involves surrounding myself with positive images that motivate and inspire me. This also means controlling the external things that trigger my unhealthy eating. Not buying sweets, or if they are here keeping them out of sight. This also includes curbing and controlling those stimuli that keeping me from getting up and moving or exercising, such as usage of the cell phone, laptop, nook, and other things that keep me sedentary. There is a time and place for these things as long as it is not all-consuming.
3. Re-Involve My Support Structure – This entails involving my friends and family back into my motivation,inspiration, and accountability process. I have always been very lucky to have a strong support structure. My family and friends, when asked and involved have always been more than willingly to help me on my path to getting healthy. They support me, compliment me, motivate and inspire me, the are also very well adept in the art of kicking my ass when I need it. FOLKS….I think it may be time for that swift kick in the ass!!! JUST SAYIN….
4. Make a New Plan – Making a plan, well..it takes planning! lol This one I will give a great deal of thought to and come up with a comprehensive plan by the end of the day. (I will update my blog on that later..)
5. Make New Realistic Specific Goals – I have a knack for goal setting. The really great thing is when I am motivated NOTHING stops me from achieving my goals. I guess I am stubborn that way! (ask my friends and family…) My first goal for today is to get up and move, more specifically I am going to grab my fur-babies, and a family member that wants to tag along and we are going to take a Sunday afternoon stroll!  I am GOING to log and watch what I eat starting now…(as I have been eating all morning…I am ravenous…(in fact had a frozen bean and beef chimichanga with cheese and FF sour cream and taco sauce before I started this blog!) because the steroids make me want to eat everything in sight, if I must eat or snack it will be healthy and appropriate portions.
6. BE POSITIVE – Out of all of these, this step is really the most important! But I am already ahead of the game…on Jan 1 I started a gratitude blog, a 365 days of good project, and the January Moments that Matter Instagram picture journal Event. All of these are great projects that forces you to see the good and positive things in your life. Its only been 20 days since I began these projects but I am already better for it. Participating in these activities makes me appreciate life and all the wonderful, positive things it has to offer. I think my favorite is the gratitude blog. Gratitude is so powerful, it is diagnostic, curative, and humbling.

Now that I have written a book here, I should wrap up.I think the moral to this story is everyone is human, including myself! We are wonderfully imperfect and fallible. No matter how imperfect we are or how many times we fall…with intention, determination, and motivation we can get up…dust ourselves off…get back on that proverbial horse and ride again!

 

~Brandy

Short n Sweet…

Let me just say I am a HUGE believer that short and sweet, YET INTENSE workouts are just as effective as long drawn out ones!! When you can burn 200 calories in 17 minutes that ROCKS!! I feel magnificent!! The bonus????? When doing HIIT and going all out, you get the “Afterburn”!! As I sit I am still burning calories!! YAY Turbofire!!!

Having said that its a trade off sometimes the longer sessions are needed to sustain ones target heart-rate, however intensity is still key!! Moral of the story kids??? Whatever you do kick it in the ass and turn it up a notch!! 😛

Friday Motivation. Get You Some!

Who couldn’t use some motivation for Fridays?! Friday’s are usually my rest day. Going back to work on Friday’s usually dampens my motivation to workout! I think today I will step out of MY comfort zone and get some exercise in. Why don’t you join me???

 

Boot Camp…Feel the BURN!

I have always been a huge fan of the workouts that combine elements. I love interval training that involved strength and cardio. I am not one of those that subscribes to conventional wisdom that says you should lift on non-consecutive days alternating cardio and strength training. If I can get it in one intense sweaty package, I prefer that. Recently I have discovered the boot camp. I’ve done many in recent months. The newest one is a weight circuit with small bursts of cardio. It is simply titled “Boot Camp Workout #1”. As I am a lover of Pinterest, I found this workout there as well. The equipment you will need is a timer, heavy set of dumbbells, and a light set of DB’s. You perform each exercise for one minute, then begin the second circuit. As is smart with all workouts warming up is important. So with this workout you start with a 5 min warm-up of cardio of your choice. Then begin the first circuit.

1. Squats – Go with the heavy DB’s

2. Shoulder Press – Heavy again

3. Bicep Curls – Heavy weight again, I do approximately half the minute doing both arms and then single arm curls

4. Standing Skull Crushers (tricep extensions) – The workout suggest Heavy. Here I tend to go lighter.

5. Rear Delt Fly – Light db’s

6. Jump Squats – As many as you can do in 1 minute.

7. Crunches – As many as possible in 1 minute.

8. Push-Ups – Again as many as possible in 1 min. Sometimes when I am using this for just a strength routine and leaving out the cardio, I will do chest presses here with heavy db’s.

9. Upright Row – Again Heavy weight.

10. Plie Squats – Heavy DB’s. (This is a wide stance squat with toes turned out.)

You do five more minutes of cardio of choice at this point.

Then I rest for 2 mins and begin again.

After Repeating the circuit a 2nd time, add 2-5 mins of cool-down. I usually do some light cardio for 5 mins.

If you do the workout like this its about 40 minutes long total.

As mentioned before there are some days that I leave out the cardio aspect. I eliminate the Jump Squats and Push-ups as well. But add in chest press. This takes the exercises to #9 and you have a kick-ass 22 minute upper body routine, with a smidge of core and legs thrown in for good measure.

I can tell you this is a great arm workout. By the end my upper body is screaming. When you add the cardio in with it, you have a great total body cardio-strength training Boot-Camp!! Try it out!!!

Sun Salutations, Piper, and the Lazy Cat Pose…

In my quest to relax, deal with stress, and have a peaceful harmonious mind and spirit; I have taken quite the liking to Yoga. I’ve dabbled in it over the last few years, mainly with the mindset that it is a bunch of mumbo jumbo hoodoo. After taking my “Mapping the Mind-Body Divide” class last term and realizing the importance of CAM practices (complimentary and alternative), I began to slowly incorporate yoga into my weekly routine. After reading several articles/studies explaining the benefits of doing yoga and yoga breathing for asthmatics,  (of which I am one!) I was completely sold. Weeks later, and thanks to Sara Ivanhoe and her CRUNCH: Candlelight Yoga, a wondrous thing occurred, I really began to LOVE Yoga!! I love how it relaxes and refreshes me, how it is assisting in my balance(physical&mental), flexibility, and how it is improving my breathing. I am a huge fan of the meditative aspect of yoga, as well as the flow and beauty of the Vinyasa’s. What I am really digging right now is the workouts that combine my new love of yoga and my love for Pilates. I am a huge fan of the fusion of the two!! The two blend deliciously together for a powerhouse work-out. (My favorite being the CRUNCH: Super SlimDown – Pilates Yoga Blend” with Ellen Barrett whom is a necessity for ALL my Pilates needs!)

        

Which brings me to this morning. When I woke up I knew immediately I wanted to do some yoga, but I also knew I was longing to be outside. Now mind you, all the yoga I have done up to this point has been inside. I guess I was somewhat inspired by Sara Ivanhoe’s “Yoga on the Edge” which was filmed in very beautiful serene destinations.  I made the executive decision to take my yoga mat, my cellphone with my fave relaxation music app, and myself out-doors. I took some pictures so I could share with you my view!! I chose to face my humble yet cozy home, as it is where my heart resides (my family). As I am getting setup I have a visitor, Miss Piper, our grey-white-black striped stray cat that has adopted us. Piper is new a mom, and as the fur-baby’s were lost in peaceful slumber she decided to grace me with her presence. Now Piper is somewhat of an outcast, she isn’t exactly accepted by our other cats. However, I understand her and she and I are kindred spirits as I have been that outcast…so needless to say she has taken a liking to me and I her! As I am sitting cross-legged meditating, she keeps her distance as if she senses something spiritual is going on, but isn’t far away. In fact she is sitting on the back of my mat. I would like to think she is assisting me by holding the mat down! 😀 As I am done with my sitting poses I stand and assume Mountain pose at this point she comes around in front of me and looks at me curiously as I move to Urdhva Hastasana, or Upward Salute.

She continues to watch me as I go into a bend, lunge, then downward dog, ETC ETC. By the time I get to Bhujangasana, or Cobra she has begun her own yoga pose. NOW I see where they get Cat Pose. By the time I am back to downward dog (my favorite pose along with Vrksasana, or Tree pose) she looks bored, swishes her tail at me in dismissal and plops down in back again, once again holding my mat for me! 😀 I do another round of Sun Salutations, meditating, enjoying my quiet mind and the harmony that is coming from my being  inter-connected with nature and the world around me. I finish up with Tree pose after my salutation.

“The Lazy Cat” pose!!

When I am done and the sights and sounds of reality have eagerly returned, I look for my curious companion. She is no longer holding down my mat, but in the shade of our square-foot garden box meditating on her own!

The Divine light in me, Salutes the Divine light in you. Namaste.

~B

What Motivates You?

mo·ti·va·tion/ˌmōtəˈvāSHən/

Noun:

The reason or reasons one has for acting or behaving in a particular way. The general desire or willingness of someone to do something.

Honestly, I would be lying if I didn’t say that VANITY plays a huge part in motivating me to get into shape!! Who doesn’t want to look good?!?! But in doing so I feel better, get around better, less health problems, and I will be around to watch my kids grow…and be that sexy grandma! (WHAT? Don’t look at me like that who the hell doesn’t want to look good in their 50’s, 60’s, or hell even 70’s!!) Quite honestly my original motivation was Sea World!!! Yes Sea World. If you have read my first post, you will understand why. I wanted to get rid of the shame and negative image of that 340-350 lbs 34 year old mom and wife who could barely get around. Who stood in line at the ride for 2 hours comparing how fat she was to other Obese people!! Sea World kicked my brain into the Contemplative Stage of change. (for more information research “transtheoretical model of behavior change“)

I think now however my motivation has changed. Do I still want to look great?? HELL YES!! But I want to be healthy more. Fit and healthy!! I want to have a fit body free from illness and disease. A healthy mind that finds healthy ways to relieve stress, anger, and other curve-balls life throws at me. And also a healthy joyous spirit.

I was chatting with my best-friend Ed (shout out Boo!!) the other morning. He had worked out at the gym riding a recumbent bike, mid ride he sends me a picture from his phone. The pic is of him drenched in sweat. Later as we are chatting I asked how he did it. I think he thought I was asking what motivates him, when in reality I was asking a different question. However his answer fascinated me. He said he did it for the satisfaction of knowing he accomplished the task. (i am sure I am paraphrasing…) He doesn’t know this but I took pause at his response. What a novel thought….motivation to exercise coming from the simplistic idea of personal satisfaction for completing a task!!! I had one of those AH-HA moments with that thought, and I am striving to get to that point. ( I am working on that! :D)

At present my motivation comes from three ideas..

• Liking what I see when I look in the mirror!!!
• Being able to breath easier!!!
• Happy healthy living for longevity!!

Other Motivation to Become and STAY Healthy….

• Fat Increases your Risk for the big C
• Heart Attack
• Fat and Sedentary Lifestyles are bad for your Brain – there are studies that correlate the amount of fat on your body with increased risk of dementia later in life
• Being Unhealthy and Obese Leads to Increased Bouts of Depression
• Fat and Unhealthy lifestyles are huge “BLOCKS” in the  bedroom
• Obesity interferes with Fertility
• You are less likely to get that New Job if you are Obese or Overweight –  According to studies obese job applicants are rated more negatively and are less likely to be hired than others with the same qualifications. Overweight people tend to earn less than normal-weight people holding comparable jobs, but when they suffer from the diseases they’re at greater risk for they’re also likely to pay more for health care.

So WHAT motivates you?? I am always interested in hearing the ideas, inspiration, and stories from others on where they get the motivation to live a healthy lifestyle!! As individuals where we find our source of motivation will vary greatly. However what is most important is that we are able to look within and find what drives us forward to do what is required to lead a healthy, happy, harmonious, and balanced life of wellness!

~B

PS>>>>I would love to hear from everyone in the comments section, what MOTIVATES YOU?

The Hellish Harpy has RETURNED…

     

     So yes the Hellish Harpy has returned. The “harpy” has come about from my daughter Savannah. APPARENTLY when I get upset or angry, the more angry I get the more loud and shrill I become. For years, unnoticed by me, when I would do this she would flap imaginary “HARPY” wings. Then a “CA-CAW” would ensue. Not really sure how I missed this over the years, but it was finally brought to my attention a few weeks ago. Now, of course, its a big running inside joke between my family, a few of the kid’s friends, and myself. (oh how I love the oxford comma…but I digress) That brings us to this week. I returned to work a day early this week, as I picked up an extra shift. Now one of my biggest struggles with exercising is being motivated to workout after a 12 hour shift at the hospital. Usually I work every Friday, Saturday, and Sunday night. I have done this for 5 years. So getting off at 7am, driving 25 minutes home, by the time I get there I am ready to hit the showers and pass out. Although there are some mornings I stop at the walking track down the road from the hospital and walk for 30 mins then go home. Its pretty amazing, I feel so good afterwards, and even though on those rare days I get less sleep but tend to sleep better!! (things that make you go Hmmmmm….INDEED)

So kids…its confession time. I have not worked out for two days (well until 10pm on Saturday night…since I was cancelled and put on call). And I have noticed that when there are large pauses between workout days, YES you guessed it…THE HELLISH HARPY RETURNS!  We all hear from the “experts” how important exercise is on the body. How it maintains a healthy weight, increases cardiopulmonary function, decreases your risk for heart disease, diabetes, and hypertension. Exercise increases functional fitness as well as extends life.  The experts, however wonderful they are, are holding out on us!! The truth is, exercise is good for your mind and emotional health and wellness as well!!! After several days of no exercise, I personally can feel myself going to my dark harpy place. I get irritable, short-tempered, and have mood swings. The longer the break, the harder it is to get back into the swing of things. Its like a domino effect. If I stop working out I become depressed and my whole outlook on life changes. They say the first step to over-coming a problem is admitting you have it in the first place. I have gotten to the place where I notice it happening. At that point, it’s  important for me to stay on track, exercise, and problem solved.

The moral of the story is that Exercise IS important for the body but the mind also. The physiological reasons aren’t important, runners high…. endorphins…doesn’t matter. What matters is exercising makes you feel good, when you feel good it improves your life. When you are happy and have a brighter outlook on life, it translates to other and you become an inspiration.

For Sunday do something good for yourself, exercise!!! All you need is at least 30 minutes. If you can’t workout the full 30, do it in 10 min intervals throughout the day. No matter your fitness level walking is a wonderful way to subdue your inner harpy!! As for my inner harpy???? After my Pilates last night that harpy bitch was shackled and chained up, hopefully for good!!

~B

 

PS…

My goal for Sunday is to exercise before work!!

Me too T-Rex!!

This makes me laugh out loud every time I see it on my desktop!! I am so weak when it comes to push-ups so I can identify!!

T-Rex and I are kindred spirits!